Sinking In
by sgtat
Summary: Episode Tag to Beneath the Surface.


Disclaimer: I have no ownership in the Stargate franchise. If I did, I would not be writing fanfiction.

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Sam turned on the lights and curled up on the couch, wishing she had a fireplace to stare into. It was a zone out kind of day.

She'd managed to get through the debriefing. She'd managed fairly well, actually. Apparently delayed reactions were good for getting through debriefings. She'd even managed to say goodnight to her teammates feeling relatively even-keeled. She hadn't been able to look _him_ quite in the eye, like she had on the planet, but she'd said goodnight. She'd ducked into the elevator before Daniel could give her their customary goodbye hug. She didn't want to be touched.

She'd felt relieved when she got into her car and left the base, and she'd taken deep breaths all the way home. She was afraid she would crash once she got there, and she was preparing herself not to.

Then, quite suddenly it seemed, she was home. She didn't remember the last several blocks. Maybe she'd been concentrating a little too hard on those deep breaths. On not remembering. She'd given a little laugh as she sat in the car in her driveway. Remembering. That was the whole problem to begin with, and it was the whole problem now.

Now she was wonderfully alone in her wonderfully empty house _not_ thinking about a wonderfully single but untouchable man. She wasn't thinking about the mission. She wasn't thinking about anything. She was concentrating on those deep breaths.

The doorbell woke her up. It was Daniel.

"Hi," he said when she opened the door, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "Did I wake you?"

"Yeah," she answered truthfully. "I wasn't in bed or anything, though – just fell asleep on the couch."

"Ah."

They stood in silence.

"Um, can I come in?" Daniel finally asked, and Sam blushed, realizing she'd kept him standing outside.

"Sure," she replied, unable to think of a good reason not to. Apparently not thinking about anything turned one's brain to mush.

She could feel his eyes on her as she closed the door behind him. She turned to face him, smiling tightly but, hopefully, convincingly.

"So what brings you over here, Daniel?" She asked, aiming for nonchalant.

"Jack, actually."

Sam froze. Her eyes darted to his. He looked back innocently.

"Jack."

"Yeah. He asked me to come check on you. Make sure you were all right."

Sam frowned. To her knowledge, he'd never sent anyone to check on her before.

"Why?"

Daniel shifted but seemed perfectly relaxed. "I dunno. He said something about you having a hard time on the planet."

She looked away, her heart pounding. Her brain really had turned to mush if she hadn't seen that one coming. She didn't realize at first that she'd folded her arms defensively.

"You okay, Thera?"

Her head snapped back up, eyes wide and unreadable in their intensity. Daniel's own eyes widened when he realized what he'd said.

"I'm s—"

"Don't you dare call me that name," she hissed, even though she knew he hadn't done it on purpose.

That gave Daniel pause. He frowned and studied her face. She didn't back down and he couldn't read her expression. Something was wrong.

"I'm sorry," he said carefully. "It's been a really long day, and the same thing happened to me that happened to you."

He watched as Sam did not register his subtle reprimand, or possibly just didn't care. Daniel had been surprised when Jack insisted on him coming over to see her, but now he was beginning to understand.

"Sam, did Jack –"

"Daniel, don't. Don't even go there."

Daniel frowned at the uncharacteristic interruption. She didn't even know what he was going to say.

"Are you okay?" He asked as non-threateningly as possible.

Sam finally broke eye contact. "No," she admitted quietly.

She could feel Daniel's surprise. Since when did she ever admit she wasn't fine? Since she got back from that stupid, stupid planet, apparently.

Daniel was silent, trying to figure out how to respond to her confession. Now was her chance to make some joke and laugh it off, warning him not to pursue the matter further. But she didn't. She couldn't make herself say the words.

Daniel's hand came to rest on her shoulder and she realized belatedly that she was trembling.

Then she was crying silently, a few rogue tears sliding from eyes that had been screwed shut too late, but she wouldn't let Daniel hug her. She stepped back when he tried. She couldn't deal with the physical contact. Not when she was trying so desperately to get herself under control before she completely lost it. Besides, it wasn't Daniel's arms she wanted. And that was the whole problem.

She drew in a shaky breath and concentrated, once again, on filling and emptying her lungs. Daniel didn't try to hug her again, but his hand did return to her shoulder. He stood there with her, giving silent support while she pulled herself together. When she thought she could finally speak without her voice trembling, she opened her eyes again and tried to send a reassuring look in the direction of Daniel's concerned gaze.

"Sorry. Like you said, it's been a long day," she said.

"Yeah," Daniel murmured, and Sam knew that he knew there was more to it than that. She gave him a furtive glance and stepped out of his reach again.

"Thanks for coming over to check on me," she said, effectively dismissing him.

Daniel's eyebrows drew together. She was kicking him out? She stood there, looking at the floor, lips pressed together, still sniffing from her tears, and she expected him to just leave?

"Sam, - "

"Daniel," she interrupted, reminiscent of Jack.

Daniel wracked his brain for something to say that wouldn't have him on her doorstep in two seconds. The only thing he could come up with was making her believe that _he_ needed company. He didn't want to manipulate her like that, but he didn't want to leave her alone like this, either. Another sniff made his decision.

"Do you mind if I stick around for a while?" he asked, stuffing his hands into his pockets, shifting his eyes to the floor. He knew she was looking at him now, taking in his stance and his request. There was a long pause and for a few shocking moments he thought she would turn him down.

He licked his lips nervously. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked that. You want to be alone. I'll leave now." He turned back to the door praying.

"Wait."

Daniel stopped, quietly releasing a breath. He didn't turn back around and there was another agonizingly long pause.

"What do you want?"

This time Daniel did turn around. She sounded so tired. She looked at him with a blank expression, and he knew that she knew he'd been faking.

"I want to help you."

"You can't." Her voice came out a whisper and Daniel's heart broke.

"Sam, - "

"I'm sorry Daniel." She looked at him steadily, completely in control again.

Daniel just looked at her.

"Okay," he said finally. Her shields were back in place, any fool who knew her could see that. There was nothing else he could do tonight.

Sam smiled sadly. "Thanks for coming over."

Daniel nodded, accepting his calm dismissal.

"Call if you need me," he invited, holding her gaze.

She smiled again and nodded. He knew she wouldn't be calling him.


End file.
